How to not take things personally — 6 mind-shifting tips [Case Study]

Photo by Ryan Franco on Unsplash

It was painful. I was wiped out from the 3 hour discussion we had, completely drained, emotionally exhausted — yet I still had to debrief the team.

In spite of all that, you barely get a thank you or an appreciation of the hard work that you’ve done. But well, it’s the culture where you are.

No thank yous and on top of that — having to listen to someone drone on and on about how your performance wasn’t good enough, you didn’t ask question 36, you didn’t probe deep enough.

You should have. You didn’t. You could have been better.

As with any area of life — getting feedback from others is an invaluable experience. It helps you grow. I rather someone tell me how I need to improve, than tell me everything was okay when it wasn’t.

But it is not always easy to accept feedback. Because as humans, we tend to take these things pretty personally. It feels like an attack on us, our worth and our competency. It feels awful.

And moving away from feedback random words and behaviour from strangers — people cutting in your queue, getting unnecessarily rude at the taxi stand, stepping on your toe in the subway, shoving past you to get into the lift… etc. It’s so easy to take all these things personally.

If you are anything like me, it can be difficult not to take things personally. But for our sanity and self-esteem, we have gotta learn how not to.

In this episode, I talk about the 6 ways we can shift our perspective in order to take things less personally and achieve greater personal freedom.

Subscribe, listen, rate and review the podcast here

Originally published at on September 20, 2020.




I write about relationships, personal growth and mental health. Dreamer. Tea addict. Researcher.

Love podcasts or audiobooks? Learn on the go with our new app.

Recommended from Medium

My Mind is in Chaos & this is how I’m planning to put things together.

A poster describing that make people feel loved

Brain Solids

“Real self-love”: On finally cultivating an intimate relationship with my heart

My 2018 Goals and Resolutions

On Days Like This: When You Cannot Write

Stay Plugged In

The Soul Purpose of a Cancer Rising

Own your accomplishments

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store
Sara | AbstractedCollective

Sara | AbstractedCollective

I write about relationships, personal growth and mental health. Dreamer. Tea addict. Researcher.

More from Medium

Our Focus Determines Our Feelings

The importance of expressing gratitude.

I want to believe in myself

What do you see in the mirror?.