Hi Marley! Thanks for the wonderful response!
How true — I know 2 friends like this — which was what inspired this post, ha! -, and like you, I’ve coped by just cutting down social time with them. It was exhausting. One particular one would always find a way to talk about herself even when I was talking about something totally unrelated! Add to the fact that she jumps around 10 different topics all at once, giving you no chance to properly respond to any. It really doesn’t bode well for a long term friendship.
And that’s right — you end up not caring about what they have to say, sadly. Whenevr this pal talks, I always end up observing other people, doing other things or checking my phone. I know it’s kinda mean, but I’m not invested in a conversation that is never gonna involve me talking, but 100% listening.
You are spot on about the lonely bit! I suspect that’s another reason they love talking to people who pay attention to them. It’s like that’s the one of the few times they get to let things off their chest and it comes out like verbal diarrhoea to whomever is listening. But true, this friend is generous to the extreme and does things for me that other people don’t. That’s where our conflicting feelings come in — it’s like we like and truly appreciate this part of them but then their talking turns us off.
Yes, sometimes I feel sad doing away with such friendships, but I see it as a sacrifice for my mental health, happiness and well-being. Gotta surround ourselves with people who don’t constantly make us feel terrible! Thank you for your kind words :) I’m really surprised but pleased that it has resonated with so many. Have a great day ahead, Marley! :D